Monday, April 28, 2014

Healer

I am the nurse. 
I am the caretaker to the broken hearted. I am the secret holder, 
the truth giver, 
the one that consoles. 
I am the one who loves 
the half empty hearts. 
I fix the broken cups. 
I bandage the broken memories. 
I am the lover. 
I am the chance giver. 
I am the goddess of love 
and forgiveness. 
I am the late night phone call. 
I am the sip of whiskey. 
I am the tissue the wipes the tears. 
I am the healer. 

But….who heals the healer?

Saturday, April 26, 2014

within

and I used to question.
now I no longer wonder,
I no longer try to “get it”,
I simply am.
I am within all that I need to be at this moment

Friday, April 25, 2014

to be remembered

she was a beauty
disguised
as a disaster;
focused on falling
into broken buildings,
and building homes
out of hay.
shelter to the unloved,
a hospital to the broken.
she wanted to be remembered
by her heart,
never by her face.

queendom

I am rebuilding a kingdom.
a kingdom fit for a woman,
a woman with pride,
and joy,
and love.
the difference is,
this kingdom needs no man.
so forgive me
if I don't follow your silly words
and your flirty lies.
I may not respond
to your hand on my thigh
or your lips on my cheek,
for I am one within myself.
I am the one I need.

one of love

I opened myself,
like a window,
and let all of the light
in my soul,
shine outside of me.
my goal is to be infinite.
I am a goddess,
and I strive to be remembered,
as one of love.

i wrote about you

I wrote about you,
not because my whole world evolved around you,
but because you were an entire world.
you were beauty.
you were an undocumented
species,
in the depths of the ocean
that we haven't even discovered yet.
I wrote about you,
not because you were calm,
but because you let passion
run through your fingers
into my heart.
you were a candle,
waiting to be lit,
a bomb,
waiting to go off.
I wrote about you,
not because I loved you,
but because my words loved you,
the pen, the ink,
the keyboard,
the screen,
the open document,
they loved you.
and I dare not ignore
what my mind tells me to
speak.
I wrote about you,
because you weren't mine,
you were all yours,
but you were able to share a piece
of you,
with me.

Saturday, April 19, 2014

drowning

my only concern at this point is how I can heal me.
I cant always worry about who else is under water,
next thing I know,
i'll be drowning too.

they should have warned us

they don't warn you about love,
and the lovers that wont love you back.
and how bad it hurts,
and you'll want to blame yourself,
for every little mistake,
every little chip and crack
in the glass.
they don't warn you,
that sometimes
your effort
does not equal
obligation.
and your effort
does not mean
reciprocated love.
some hearts are not meant to be held.
some hearts are fresh out the oven
and if you hold on to long,
you'll find yourself
with burns,
and welts all over your hands.
you'll put to much pressure
on yourself,
and instead of turning into a diamond,
you will turn into sand.
they didn't warn you about that.
they didn't warn you about how it hurts,
how it pulls,
and how it feels like you've
dipped your heart into ice water,
and you're watching it slowly
stop.
they didn't warn you about that.

Saturday, April 5, 2014

missed opportunities

i had to choose.
i had to choose or
you were going to be
the death of
my selfless loving
ways,
and my happy to compromise
behavior.
i had to choose.
because while you were
so busy,
searching for different
diamonds
and roses.
searching for the one
to hold your hand at
night,
and rub
the soft spot
below your hairline.
you were looking for
someone to
fluff your pillow
and cover you up
while you shivered
during your slumber.
someone to be the
ex-tra-ordinary
lover.
i thought it would have been me.
i thought that
making sure you were fed,
giving you your time,
scrubbing your back,
and sharing the most
intimate
moments with you
would have been it.
instead,
i could not have been your lover,
i know,
you love me,
but you don’t love me like
i love you.
i am deeply in love with you.
i am sure of you.
you are still searching.
now where does that leave me.