intuition

i thought that if
i silenced you enough,
you would disappear.
i assumed that you
were here to destroy
everything i came across
with anxiety
and confusion.
like a rebellious teen,
i recognized what you could
be harming,
instead of
what you were really saving me from.

in love with self

I am
The flower
That bloomed
In the closet
That stood tall
In the lonely garden.
That showed love
To the broken hearted.

stop forcing yourself

I am starting to realize
that my alone time
is just as valuable
than my time with others.
I am learning this,
after years of forcing myself
to be in an overwhelming amount
of social situations,
for too long
for the sake of society's
"guidelines".
I am happier now.

be big

when the person that you love,
treats you like you are not worthy
of their love,
let them go.
their love is toxic to you,
and will teach you to belittle yourself.
you need to grow.

To Rest

here I am,
carrying a chip on my shoulder
that gives me the illusion of
carrying the
world on
my back.
Such a small thing,
causing so many problems
and I am still supposed to smile.
spare me
the "i have to be strong"
bullshit,
sometimes I just want
to lay down my head,
and
rest until I feel sane again.

for my loves

occasionally,
I ask the universe
how it decides
who walks into my life,
whether it is random
(which I now know for sure
it is definitely not)
because there was definitely
a reason for meeting you.
I can see how
our galaxies
collide,
into beautiful
colors, and
beautiful collection of stars.
I see myself in you,
and I see the sun
every time I experience
your happiness.
I experience rain,
every time the clouds
get you down.
I question how anyone,
much rather you,
could look at yourself
and see anything but
perfection.
pure gold.
You reflection
shows the genuine
intention,
and deep love
you have experienced,
and how strong you have
become.
I see in you,
your mother,
your ancestors,
your moments in heaven,
your moments from hell.
And there is no one,
that I could
replace
your soul
with.
Thank You.
You have brightened my life
beyond understanding.
I am sending
so much love
to you,
for always.

This is for you

When you came to love me,
I learned the difference between
being loved,
and being used.
Then I learned,
you didn't really love me at all.

is that enough

I still believe in you,
is that enough?
even though you have become
an unrecognizable face
in the crowd
until you decide you are lonely
and decide you want to get a taste
of my world again
(however, that only lasts a second).
I don't know where you went.
I don't know where the love
went.
I don't know what the love is.
shit,
I don't know what I did.
But I'm still here,
I still believe in you
and on your darkest hours,
remember that I am sending you
the brightest light.
I am still cheering you on,
even though I'm not on the field,
I'm hiding behind the stands
until you acknowledge me again.

shine your light loudly so others can hear

you are
an edible collection
of letters,
a cluster of words
that spell out
the most delectable
chocolate.
you are all of the riches,
that the queen wears
to a ceremony
of the departing of a life,
and all of the control
the king has over
his largest army.
you are a paradox,
a combination of far right
and far left ideas,
a beautiful safe containing
love letters,
a tragic mess of heartbreaks.
stop hating yourself,
when you are the one
that has been pulling yourself up
all of these years.
you're worth a beautiful symphony
of words.
sing the song of
your soul
loudly.

stay away from the water if you cannot swim

if you expect me
to silence my words,
cover my hurt,
and let go of my strength,
you have no reason
to try to speak to my soul,
much less to the life
in between my legs.
you don't go to the ocean
and ask it to stop creating waves,
because you are afraid of
drowning.

ill love the parts of you that you hate

if you can trust me,
let me speak light
into your wounds
to brighten up the places
that people have ruined
with their darkness.
let me bandage the places
with love,
to remind you that you are still,
as well as have been,
and always will be
beautiful.
that your soul is more than just
a container for
other people's problems.
it is more than the
cuts,
scars,
burns,
it is a beautiful
collection of
stars.

speechless

I cannot describe myself with words.
whether this is a good thing,
or a bad thing.
I am satisfied.

welcome morning

i like the mornings after
painful nights
the most.
my soul likes to listen,
heal,
and repair itself
while i am deep in slumber.
i'm thankful that my heart
likes to piece itself
back together peacefully.

you dont have to be small

you are as gentle as a cool breeze,
and as powerful as the sun.
stop selling your self short for others.
you can be great,
and they can be great.
nature needs multiple things to prosper.

forgetfulness

Your name is another collection of letters
in the alphabet I learned when I was younger.
It no longer forms a specific word to me,
nothing special,
just a cluster of letters
that will be forgotten as soon
as I rest my bags at the door
and start a midday snack.
Comfort.
Because when we were young,
we weren't confined to our
memories of the
hurt,
the boy that picked on us,
the girl that had the "cooties".
By the time the day was over,
we only had our future dreams.
Your name is just another nightmare
in the past,
another thing I'll forget as I rise
in the morning.

unapologetically naked

i think the most confident thing to do as a black woman is be confident with your naked self.
and not only nude physically, sexually.
but nude with how you are mentally, spiritually.
be in love with the curves of your body, as well as the depth of your mind.
be beautiful,
let the truth spill from your lips.
don't let yourself be caged for their approval.

you thought my heart was small

I keep little pieces
of all of the
hearts that have
fell deep
into the well
of my soul.
I still remember you,
and I am thankful for your
hurt,
your happy,
your flaws,
and your
little insecurities
that broke my
"little" heart.
when I ripped away
your pieces,
it made me feel
whole again.

i am not your sexual object

did you love her?
did you really love her?
or did you just like how your tongue
felt roaming down her side.
did you understand how her body works,
or was she only a sexual toy
used for objectification to pleasure
the most used part of your body.
did you understand her mind?
is she just a sex symbol to you?
can you appreciate her body as art?
ask yourself that the next time your
hand slides down a woman’s body.
you can love her without an orgasm

i happy you

i happy you,

is that possible?

is it possible for you

to emit a happy.

for happy to be a verb.

like love, 

it makes you feel good,

makes me smile.

when i happy you,

i want you around more,

i want you to feel 

the joy that i am trying

to shed onto your shoulders.

leaving you awake at night,

smiling,

because you have been kissed

with happiness. 

i want you to fall asleep

when you need more rest

because i happy you.

i value you.

i desire your happiness.

your happy 

makes me happy.

your happy requires my patience.

my happy requires your patience.

understanding.

maybe happy is the cousin

of the strong drug of love,

but i think happy is much stronger. 

i feel much more intertwined

with your heart

when i happy you. 

i love you,

but i want to happy you, more. 

alone is a blessing

an important part of love,
is learning how to be alone.
an important part of being alone
is learning how to enjoy it.
I've noticed that we struggle
to migrate with souls,
to blend with souls,
but it is as easy as simply
helping others understand
that you are journeying too.
you get their struggle.
embrace each other,
with open arms,
open hearts,
and spread kindness,
and you'll realize how much
of the universe is within you
and how many lives
you impact.